Official notice!
Wyatt Douglas was born on Saturday, June 9 at 10:03 PM.
He was 3 pounds 2 ounces and was 16 3/4" long.
This has been a real roller coaster ride. In some ways, I have to laugh, because I think of all the "planning" we did to move, to give birth, and NONE of it went as expected.
Just as with all the IF stuff, my body has failed me AGAIN and has gotten sick to where I had to expel my sweet boy before he was ready. At the same time, he is healthy and strong, and for that I am so grateful.
The gamut of emotions I am experiencing is overwhelming. I am sad that I didn't get to experience a labor and childbirth that was more normal. I am sad for Wyatt that he had to come so soon. I am sad that I am no longer pregnant and that there is no little guy in there kicking me and rolling around. I am so sad that he is not home with me.
Yet all this sadness is rolled up in the main happiness and elation that Wyatt is here. He is SO beautiful and I tear up just thinking about his little face. I love him more than I can imagine loving anything or anyone - just overwhelming love. I want nothing for him but happiness and love.
So in the end, years of IF, deciding to use donor eggs, going through FET, going through the ups and downs of pregnancy and especially the downs of the last few weeks of my pregnancy... it was all worth it. Because now I can hold the baby we created and I can show him all the joys of life. I hope I do it well.
He is already so sweet - his little chipmunk cry and my favorite face of his: he purses his lips into an "o" and raises his eyebrows, sometimes opening his eyes in the process and sometimes not. Holding him just melts me.
Thank you to everyone who has been a part of my IF and PG journey. Now I start a new one as a MOMMY (wow) and I'll need you more than ever. :)
Crystal
Wednesday, June 13, 2007
Saturday, June 9, 2007
Wyatt has arrived!
Last night, they started me on Cervidol (sp?) and Wyatt didn't like contractions at all. His heart rate was unstable. So this morning they came in and gave me a c-section.
I STILL haven't seen him. They whisked him away to the NICU and I have to wait until the epidural wears off and my bp stabilizes before I can go to see him.
But he is doing great! He is able to breathe on his own, is healthy and pink, and has no problems at all.
I am so happy and excited!
Crystal
---------------------
Edited 8/17/07 to add the entire story!
DH and I started ttc in January 2003. We tried for about 6 months before we talked to my OB. My periods were very irregular, so he put me on Clomid and I responded very well to it, ovulating regularly for the first time ever. But no pg. I tested every month for 8 months before we went back.
The OB suggested an HSG to check whether my tubes were open. I had it (ouch!!) and found out that my tubes were indeed closed. So the OB referred us to an RE down the street.
The RE said that IVF was our only option, so he tested my FSH (3.2) and DH's sperm (slightly low motility but definitely good enough) and we went forward.
After starting stims, we went in to check the follies. No matter how hard the RE looked, he couldn't find my ovaries. Finally, he found them - way up by my belly button! There were 22 follies, but unfortunately he had to cancel my cycle since there was no way to retrieve them. :( I was heartbroken. He told me that it may be possible to do a laparoscopic retrieval but that he didn't have the equipment to do it.
He did say that he could do a diagnostic lap to find out what was going on in there. We found that due to a surgery I had in 1993 to remove a large ovarian cyst, that my ovaries were pulled up and encased in intestines with scar tissue. He wasn't able to free them or to unblock my tubes.
So I went online and found an RE who said he could do a laparoscopic retrieval. We drove to Vegas to consult with him and when we got there, he hemmed and hawed and said "Welllll... *I* know how to do laparoscopic retrievals, but I don't have the equipment and my staff has never done one." So we had hit a roadblock again.
During a routine OB visit, my OB told me that a colleague of his just opened a clinic and that I should go talk to him. He told us that he could do another diagnostic surgery (open) and try to free the ovaries and move them down, OR we could go with donor eggs.
DH and I discussed it and since the surgery would possibly entail bowel reconstruction, we felt it was too dangerous to attempt. So after much heartache and grieving, I agreed to donor eggs. I was really sad at first, but then realized that this was a way to get to my goal of being a mother, and I would still be able to experience pregnancy and childbirth.
We used a donor agency recommended by the RE office and found a donor who looked somewhat like me, was smart, and most importantly to me, was doing it for more than the money.
The RE gave us an 80% chance of success, so we went forward happily anticipating a pregnancy. Then I was devastated when my beta came back "less than one".
We had 9 embies left, so we decided to do an FET. I was not as optimistic this time. We implanted 3 embies - 2 good ones and one that would have been discarded if we didn't implant it. I was shocked when my beta came back at 363! An ultrasound a couple weeks later confirmed that it was twins!
We were THRILLED! Then we went back for a third u/s after hearing the heart beats twice and found that one of the twins vanished. I was heartbroken AGAIN... yet still happy that the remaining twin was doing well.
The next few months were uneventful as I got sick, got sore boobs, and watched my tummy grow.
Then around 28 weeks, I started getting high blood pressure. It got worse and I was put on bed rest. Then it got WORSE and I stumbled into the hospital one night at 2AM with a blood pressure of 208/118.
After being air evaced to a better hospital, the high blood pressure turned into preeclampsia. I was told that it was a waiting game to see how far we could go before delivering. The baby was doing fine - it was all me.
Then on June 8, they gave me Cervidol to start softening my cervix. The baby didn't like that at all and his heart rate started decelerating every time I had a tiny contraction. They took the Cervidol back out and continued monitoring the baby.
At about 8AM on June 9, the doctor on call came in and strongly recommended a c-section since the baby's heart rate was still unstable. After a short discussion, DH and I agreed.
I was attacked by about 10 nurses and doctors, undressing me, dressing me, giving me shots, asking me questions... it was chaos! Then at 10:03 AM, my son Wyatt Douglas was born at 3 lbs 2 oz at 31 weeks 4 days. I was very groggy from meds but sighed with relief when I heard his cry.
I got to see him later that day and fell in love. He stayed in the NICU until July 6 - that was SO difficult.
Now, I am finally a mother. Nothing went the way I would have planned. Not my conception, not my eggs, not my pregnancy, and not the birth. But you know what? NONE of that matters. Not one bit. Because in the end, my dream came true. And when your dream comes true, the path you took to arrive there suddenly becomes SO unimportant.
My son is 100% mine. I never think about the donor (although I am eternally grateful for her contribution to us). He is mine. And I love him more than anything in the world.
See pics at Wyatt's page (http://www.xtalworld.com/wyatt)
Crystal
I STILL haven't seen him. They whisked him away to the NICU and I have to wait until the epidural wears off and my bp stabilizes before I can go to see him.
But he is doing great! He is able to breathe on his own, is healthy and pink, and has no problems at all.
I am so happy and excited!
Crystal
---------------------
Edited 8/17/07 to add the entire story!
DH and I started ttc in January 2003. We tried for about 6 months before we talked to my OB. My periods were very irregular, so he put me on Clomid and I responded very well to it, ovulating regularly for the first time ever. But no pg. I tested every month for 8 months before we went back.
The OB suggested an HSG to check whether my tubes were open. I had it (ouch!!) and found out that my tubes were indeed closed. So the OB referred us to an RE down the street.
The RE said that IVF was our only option, so he tested my FSH (3.2) and DH's sperm (slightly low motility but definitely good enough) and we went forward.
After starting stims, we went in to check the follies. No matter how hard the RE looked, he couldn't find my ovaries. Finally, he found them - way up by my belly button! There were 22 follies, but unfortunately he had to cancel my cycle since there was no way to retrieve them. :( I was heartbroken. He told me that it may be possible to do a laparoscopic retrieval but that he didn't have the equipment to do it.
He did say that he could do a diagnostic lap to find out what was going on in there. We found that due to a surgery I had in 1993 to remove a large ovarian cyst, that my ovaries were pulled up and encased in intestines with scar tissue. He wasn't able to free them or to unblock my tubes.
So I went online and found an RE who said he could do a laparoscopic retrieval. We drove to Vegas to consult with him and when we got there, he hemmed and hawed and said "Welllll... *I* know how to do laparoscopic retrievals, but I don't have the equipment and my staff has never done one." So we had hit a roadblock again.
During a routine OB visit, my OB told me that a colleague of his just opened a clinic and that I should go talk to him. He told us that he could do another diagnostic surgery (open) and try to free the ovaries and move them down, OR we could go with donor eggs.
DH and I discussed it and since the surgery would possibly entail bowel reconstruction, we felt it was too dangerous to attempt. So after much heartache and grieving, I agreed to donor eggs. I was really sad at first, but then realized that this was a way to get to my goal of being a mother, and I would still be able to experience pregnancy and childbirth.
We used a donor agency recommended by the RE office and found a donor who looked somewhat like me, was smart, and most importantly to me, was doing it for more than the money.
The RE gave us an 80% chance of success, so we went forward happily anticipating a pregnancy. Then I was devastated when my beta came back "less than one".
We had 9 embies left, so we decided to do an FET. I was not as optimistic this time. We implanted 3 embies - 2 good ones and one that would have been discarded if we didn't implant it. I was shocked when my beta came back at 363! An ultrasound a couple weeks later confirmed that it was twins!
We were THRILLED! Then we went back for a third u/s after hearing the heart beats twice and found that one of the twins vanished. I was heartbroken AGAIN... yet still happy that the remaining twin was doing well.
The next few months were uneventful as I got sick, got sore boobs, and watched my tummy grow.
Then around 28 weeks, I started getting high blood pressure. It got worse and I was put on bed rest. Then it got WORSE and I stumbled into the hospital one night at 2AM with a blood pressure of 208/118.
After being air evaced to a better hospital, the high blood pressure turned into preeclampsia. I was told that it was a waiting game to see how far we could go before delivering. The baby was doing fine - it was all me.
Then on June 8, they gave me Cervidol to start softening my cervix. The baby didn't like that at all and his heart rate started decelerating every time I had a tiny contraction. They took the Cervidol back out and continued monitoring the baby.
At about 8AM on June 9, the doctor on call came in and strongly recommended a c-section since the baby's heart rate was still unstable. After a short discussion, DH and I agreed.
I was attacked by about 10 nurses and doctors, undressing me, dressing me, giving me shots, asking me questions... it was chaos! Then at 10:03 AM, my son Wyatt Douglas was born at 3 lbs 2 oz at 31 weeks 4 days. I was very groggy from meds but sighed with relief when I heard his cry.
I got to see him later that day and fell in love. He stayed in the NICU until July 6 - that was SO difficult.
Now, I am finally a mother. Nothing went the way I would have planned. Not my conception, not my eggs, not my pregnancy, and not the birth. But you know what? NONE of that matters. Not one bit. Because in the end, my dream came true. And when your dream comes true, the path you took to arrive there suddenly becomes SO unimportant.
My son is 100% mine. I never think about the donor (although I am eternally grateful for her contribution to us). He is mine. And I love him more than anything in the world.
See pics at Wyatt's page (http://www.xtalworld.com/wyatt)
Crystal
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Sitting upright
I am at the little meal table at DH's laptop. He has brought my little work hard drive for me and everything else I have asked for. I feel better every time he walks in the room and wish he could be with me 24 hours a day. So weird from ME - who is usually so independent. Suddenly I feel needy and vulnerable and I just want him to hold me and not let go.
I hate being here... and it feels better knowing that so many other ladies here have been at this same place and came out ok on the other side.
I knew about pre-eclampsia and about the risk of being on hospital bed rest, but NOBODY warned me about magnesium sulfate. I had no idea I could ever feel that psychotic, out of control, weak, and weepy. I think I finally understand how people with mental disorders feel - you KNOW logically that you aren't making sense yet can't control anything you feel or think. Man, that is horrible and I don't wish it on ANYONE.
At this point, it is just a waiting game. I am 31w2d (Thursday). Wyatt has had his steroid shots and is hopefully growing big and strong in there. My bp is still high, around 160/100 when I am lying down. They upped my meds hoping to keep it lower. My labs are still ok (haven't gotten any actual numbers but they say that kidney and liver are better today than yesterday).
My MIL just sent out my shower invites a couple days before I was admitted, and now wants to know what I want to do about it. Heck I don't know. They can have it without me, or I may even have a baby by then and the baby will come to the shower!
She also forgot to include the registry info in the invites. Not that I care that much about the STUFF, but since I am in here until Wyatt is born, I won't be able to go shopping for him. We got a carseat and a few outfits and that is it! I guess he'll be sleeping in the sock drawer the first few nights. Hahah.
I am hanging in there. One day at a time. Heck, one moment at a time. Have I mentioned this isn't what my pregnancy was supposed to be like?
Thanks for all the prayers and thoughts - it means more than ANYTHING.
Crystal
I hate being here... and it feels better knowing that so many other ladies here have been at this same place and came out ok on the other side.
I knew about pre-eclampsia and about the risk of being on hospital bed rest, but NOBODY warned me about magnesium sulfate. I had no idea I could ever feel that psychotic, out of control, weak, and weepy. I think I finally understand how people with mental disorders feel - you KNOW logically that you aren't making sense yet can't control anything you feel or think. Man, that is horrible and I don't wish it on ANYONE.
At this point, it is just a waiting game. I am 31w2d (Thursday). Wyatt has had his steroid shots and is hopefully growing big and strong in there. My bp is still high, around 160/100 when I am lying down. They upped my meds hoping to keep it lower. My labs are still ok (haven't gotten any actual numbers but they say that kidney and liver are better today than yesterday).
My MIL just sent out my shower invites a couple days before I was admitted, and now wants to know what I want to do about it. Heck I don't know. They can have it without me, or I may even have a baby by then and the baby will come to the shower!
She also forgot to include the registry info in the invites. Not that I care that much about the STUFF, but since I am in here until Wyatt is born, I won't be able to go shopping for him. We got a carseat and a few outfits and that is it! I guess he'll be sleeping in the sock drawer the first few nights. Hahah.
I am hanging in there. One day at a time. Heck, one moment at a time. Have I mentioned this isn't what my pregnancy was supposed to be like?
Thanks for all the prayers and thoughts - it means more than ANYTHING.
Crystal
Tuesday, June 5, 2007
In the hospital
It has been an interesting few days here to say the least.
Friday night/Saturday morning around 2AM, my blood pressure went up to 208/118. Doug was in Flagstaff getting ready for the appraisal. I tried lying down to rest and was having chest pains plus my bp didn't go down like it usually does when I lie down.
So I called Doug and told him I was going to the hospital. He stayed on the phone with me while I drove over there.
At the hospital, I started feeling stupid and was wondering what I was doing there. One of the nurses found my chart from my previous visit and basically shook her head and said my bp was fine last time I was there.
But the labs came back showing that my liver enzymes were high and that I was getting preeclampsia.
So they did a lot of heart/lung tests to rule out any cardiac problems since I was having chest pains. Those all came back ok.
The next step was getting to a better hospital. They loaded me up on the helicopter and flew me to one of the downtown hospitals that has a good high-risk center and NICU.
More tests, more tests, and more tests, they then confirm that my 24-hour urine is really high and I am preeclamptic. At this point they told me that I will be in the hospital until I deliver, which they are trying to hold off as long as my tests come back acceptable.
Saturday was ok, but on Sunday I started having really bad reactions to the magnesium sulfate they put me on to prevent seizures. I got all weepy and weird and lethargic and didn't feel like myself. Doug had to go back to Flagstaff to pick up his dad who he had left there to get some work done while he came back to be with me.
Then Monday night was the worst. Doug had to go to Flagstaff because the appraiser would be there Tuesday morning, and the hospital moved me to a new room. I started having a full-out-panic-anxiety attack. I still don't know if it was from the magnesium sulfate or from sleep deprivation or what, but I was hallucinating and freaking out. Even worse, being alone, I had nobody to tell the new nurses that NO I am not normally like that. I couldn't breathe, couldn't sleep, and it was horrible. The doctor confirmed that I had some crackling in my lungs and gave me some meds, then the nurse gave me some finnegran(sp???) which would also help me sleep. That was weird - I went from panic to falling asleep - I literally felt like I was put under anesthesia and fell asleep.
I slept all day today, and only now do I SORTA feel like myself again. I am still out of it and sleepy but at least I feel in control of my emotions. Doug is here with me now which makes things so much easier. So now we just wait and see how long I can go before I deliver.
I hope this entry even makes SENSE. I am so not me.
Crystal
Friday night/Saturday morning around 2AM, my blood pressure went up to 208/118. Doug was in Flagstaff getting ready for the appraisal. I tried lying down to rest and was having chest pains plus my bp didn't go down like it usually does when I lie down.
So I called Doug and told him I was going to the hospital. He stayed on the phone with me while I drove over there.
At the hospital, I started feeling stupid and was wondering what I was doing there. One of the nurses found my chart from my previous visit and basically shook her head and said my bp was fine last time I was there.
But the labs came back showing that my liver enzymes were high and that I was getting preeclampsia.
So they did a lot of heart/lung tests to rule out any cardiac problems since I was having chest pains. Those all came back ok.
The next step was getting to a better hospital. They loaded me up on the helicopter and flew me to one of the downtown hospitals that has a good high-risk center and NICU.
More tests, more tests, and more tests, they then confirm that my 24-hour urine is really high and I am preeclamptic. At this point they told me that I will be in the hospital until I deliver, which they are trying to hold off as long as my tests come back acceptable.
Saturday was ok, but on Sunday I started having really bad reactions to the magnesium sulfate they put me on to prevent seizures. I got all weepy and weird and lethargic and didn't feel like myself. Doug had to go back to Flagstaff to pick up his dad who he had left there to get some work done while he came back to be with me.
Then Monday night was the worst. Doug had to go to Flagstaff because the appraiser would be there Tuesday morning, and the hospital moved me to a new room. I started having a full-out-panic-anxiety attack. I still don't know if it was from the magnesium sulfate or from sleep deprivation or what, but I was hallucinating and freaking out. Even worse, being alone, I had nobody to tell the new nurses that NO I am not normally like that. I couldn't breathe, couldn't sleep, and it was horrible. The doctor confirmed that I had some crackling in my lungs and gave me some meds, then the nurse gave me some finnegran(sp???) which would also help me sleep. That was weird - I went from panic to falling asleep - I literally felt like I was put under anesthesia and fell asleep.
I slept all day today, and only now do I SORTA feel like myself again. I am still out of it and sleepy but at least I feel in control of my emotions. Doug is here with me now which makes things so much easier. So now we just wait and see how long I can go before I deliver.
I hope this entry even makes SENSE. I am so not me.
Crystal
Wednesday, May 30, 2007
So many things happening at once!
My OB was back in the office today. He is transferring me to a perinatologist. My blood pressure is still really high, even taking the meds. From what he is saying, I may end up delivering even earlier than 37w. He really scared me today, saying that the BABY is at high risk and that the baby could die!!!!
I have been lying down doing nothing all day. Keeping my baby safe is by far the most important thing.
So now I am really scared and can't even think that after all I've been through to get here, I *STILL* may end up getting more bad news. Really - it's been enough. I just want a healthy happy baby.
We are still talking about moving to our new place before the baby gets here, although now it would be a "grab the things we use and we'll come back for the rest later" type move. We found a perinatologist in Flagstaff and I am pre-registered at the hospital there, so it is just a big juggling act day-by-day seeing what will happen.
I can't believe I had a perfectly happy pregnancy and was walking around beaming just a couple short weeks ago, and now I am basically fighting for myself and Wyatt.
Anyway, enough ranting. I'll go back to the couch and keep my feet up.
Crystal
I have been lying down doing nothing all day. Keeping my baby safe is by far the most important thing.
So now I am really scared and can't even think that after all I've been through to get here, I *STILL* may end up getting more bad news. Really - it's been enough. I just want a healthy happy baby.
We are still talking about moving to our new place before the baby gets here, although now it would be a "grab the things we use and we'll come back for the rest later" type move. We found a perinatologist in Flagstaff and I am pre-registered at the hospital there, so it is just a big juggling act day-by-day seeing what will happen.
I can't believe I had a perfectly happy pregnancy and was walking around beaming just a couple short weeks ago, and now I am basically fighting for myself and Wyatt.
Anyway, enough ranting. I'll go back to the couch and keep my feet up.
Crystal
Monday, May 21, 2007
The good news is I don't have pre-eclampsia...
... the bad news is I do have gestational diabetes. I failed my 3-hour and had to go pick up supplies to test myself.
Also got meds for my high blood pressure, which was 170/116 at the OB office.
The plan now is to get me to 37 weeks before inducing. OB said that going to 40 weeks is unlikely with all my problems.
Crystal
Also got meds for my high blood pressure, which was 170/116 at the OB office.
The plan now is to get me to 37 weeks before inducing. OB said that going to 40 weeks is unlikely with all my problems.
Crystal
Friday, May 18, 2007
Did 3-hour glucose and have follow-up Monday
Then after the ultrasound appointment, I got to lie on an oh-so-comfy bed in the doctor's office for 3 hours. Hopefully this glucose test comes back ok.
My blood pressure was 148/93. I have to go back on Monday afternoon to get checked again and the nurse told me to expect the doctor to put me on bed rest. I guess I will start working from home earlier than expected!
Keeping my job is going to be the challenging part of this. I have sooo much to do before taking off for maternity leave.
Crystal
My blood pressure was 148/93. I have to go back on Monday afternoon to get checked again and the nurse told me to expect the doctor to put me on bed rest. I guess I will start working from home earlier than expected!
Keeping my job is going to be the challenging part of this. I have sooo much to do before taking off for maternity leave.
Crystal
3d/4d ultrasound
Well, we did it! Little Wyatt didn't cooperate too well. First, his cord was over his face blurring the image, then when she got him to move, he complied by moving his fists over his face. :)
Still, the pics are cute! Each is followed by its "map".
http://www.xtalworld.com/051806us.jpg
http://www.xtalworld.com/051806us2.jpg
http://www.xtalworld.com/051806us3.jpg
http://www.xtalworld.com/051806us4.jpg
http://www.xtalworld.com/051806us5.jpg
http://www.xtalworld.com/051806us6.jpg
Crystal
Thursday, May 17, 2007
Ended up in the hospital today... and failed 1-hour glucose
My blood pressure was still really high this morning so the OB sent me to the hospital. They had me lie on my left side and it slowly went down. It is showing a little protein in the urine, so I am doing a 24 hour urine collection. Also my 1-hour glucose yesterday was 188, so I am doing the 3-hour tomorrow.
They put me on bed rest and I have to be off work at least until I see my OB Monday or Tuesday.
Ai-yi-yi.
Well, at least the baby is doing well as his mama falls apart. :D
He HATED the monitor being over him and kept kicking it. It was cool because his kicks were really loud.
Crystal
They put me on bed rest and I have to be off work at least until I see my OB Monday or Tuesday.
Ai-yi-yi.
Well, at least the baby is doing well as his mama falls apart. :D
He HATED the monitor being over him and kept kicking it. It was cool because his kicks were really loud.
Crystal
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Bought a blood pressure monitor and...
... my blood pressure is now 155/100! It was 163/105 but has gone down a little after lying down for 30 minutes.
I am going to take a bath and an aspirin and see if I can lower it until the morning when I can call my ob.
If not, I may end up taking a trip to the ER tonight.
I am really freaking out (which probably isn't helping the bp).
Crystal
I am going to take a bath and an aspirin and see if I can lower it until the morning when I can call my ob.
If not, I may end up taking a trip to the ER tonight.
I am really freaking out (which probably isn't helping the bp).
Crystal
Being checked for pre-eclampsia
I told my OB (well, his assistant who saw me today) about my swelling feet, so she took some extra blood to check me for pre-eclampsia. I should know something by Friday. My blood pressure was high - 142/90. So hopefully it is something I can treat easily. I'll wait to hear back.
I also did my one-hour glucose test today. Man is that stuff nasty!
The good news is that the baby is still fine. His heart rate is 152 and he was trying to escape the doppler. :D
28 weeks today. Woohoo. We're getting there, baby.
Crystal
I also did my one-hour glucose test today. Man is that stuff nasty!
The good news is that the baby is still fine. His heart rate is 152 and he was trying to escape the doppler. :D
28 weeks today. Woohoo. We're getting there, baby.
Crystal
Monday, May 14, 2007
My feet look like water balloons!
I know swollen feet are common in pregnancy, but honestly this is the most annoying side effect yet. I'd go back to the morning sickness to get my normal feet back. :(
Is it getting to where by the end of the day, my ankles are stretched with "rolls"!
And they hurt.
And I am getting VERY VERY tired. It is hard for me to do even the simplest of tasks and it is frustrating to not have "control" over my body.
I will be 28w on Wednesday and while I am THRILLED to be pregnant and smile everytime I touch my belly, I am starting to understand the negative side of pregnancy.
Crystal
Is it getting to where by the end of the day, my ankles are stretched with "rolls"!
And they hurt.
And I am getting VERY VERY tired. It is hard for me to do even the simplest of tasks and it is frustrating to not have "control" over my body.
I will be 28w on Wednesday and while I am THRILLED to be pregnant and smile everytime I touch my belly, I am starting to understand the negative side of pregnancy.
Crystal
Friday, May 11, 2007
Next year will be my first Mother's Day...
...and I will be 40! WOW. I never expected to be that old before being a mommy.
Ah well, at least I will be one. I feel very lucky and blessed.
Ah well, at least I will be one. I feel very lucky and blessed.
Wednesday, May 9, 2007
Another weird dream
This time, I have to take my boss to the airport because he is going to France. (He's going on vacation to France in real life too, but I don't have to take him anywhere :) ).
There are no good flights leaving from Phoenix, so he tells me he is leaving from Las Vegas. We start driving and he says that the Vegas flight doesn't work, so we have to drive to... Virginia! And we have to be there by 10PM. I am driving as fast as I can and am really stressed out. I have him looking all over for closer flights as we rush to Virginia, knowing that there is no way to get from Phoenix to Virginia in less than a day.
Weird!
Crystal
There are no good flights leaving from Phoenix, so he tells me he is leaving from Las Vegas. We start driving and he says that the Vegas flight doesn't work, so we have to drive to... Virginia! And we have to be there by 10PM. I am driving as fast as I can and am really stressed out. I have him looking all over for closer flights as we rush to Virginia, knowing that there is no way to get from Phoenix to Virginia in less than a day.
Weird!
Crystal
Tuesday, May 8, 2007
Weird dreams!
I would blame pregnancy, but I have always had odd dreams.
A couple of weeks ago, I had a very sweet dream where I was in the hospital bed, and someone laid my naked baby down on my chest. He was staring at me and I just smiled and said "Hi there." It was so realistic, and I could feel his skin, smell his smell, and feel his warmth.
Then a couple nights ago, I dreamed that he was telling me that he wanted to wear "big boy underwear" and he was walking around. I asked my mom how old he was and she said "Seven days". !!!! Eeek!
Last night, I dreamed that my dad brought a tupperware container of iridescent blue butterflies for everyone to snack on. When he opened the lid, of course some of the butterflies started flying around, so I was shooing them outside so they wouldn't get eaten. Everyone else was happily munching butterflies!
Crystal
A couple of weeks ago, I had a very sweet dream where I was in the hospital bed, and someone laid my naked baby down on my chest. He was staring at me and I just smiled and said "Hi there." It was so realistic, and I could feel his skin, smell his smell, and feel his warmth.
Then a couple nights ago, I dreamed that he was telling me that he wanted to wear "big boy underwear" and he was walking around. I asked my mom how old he was and she said "Seven days". !!!! Eeek!
Last night, I dreamed that my dad brought a tupperware container of iridescent blue butterflies for everyone to snack on. When he opened the lid, of course some of the butterflies started flying around, so I was shooing them outside so they wouldn't get eaten. Everyone else was happily munching butterflies!
Crystal
Thursday, April 19, 2007
I love being pregnant!
I love the way I look pg.
This is the first time in my life I haven't bought clothes to hide my belly, but instead am THRILLED that my belly is protruding.
I am having so much fun buying clothes I would usually never wear (I am normally a baggy-tshirt kind of gal).
Add that to the pure happiness of actually being pg! I really NEVER thought I would be here. And now that I feel him kicking me several times a day, I am much less worried and much more optimistic.
We are having a baby!
Crystal
This is the first time in my life I haven't bought clothes to hide my belly, but instead am THRILLED that my belly is protruding.
I am having so much fun buying clothes I would usually never wear (I am normally a baggy-tshirt kind of gal).
Add that to the pure happiness of actually being pg! I really NEVER thought I would be here. And now that I feel him kicking me several times a day, I am much less worried and much more optimistic.
We are having a baby!
Crystal
Tuesday, April 17, 2007
23w4d U/S
Went back in for the follow-up U/S. Everything looked great. The tech was able to see the heart more clearly, measure the femurs, kidneys, etc. Absolutely no problems.
The baby was sitting with his ankles crossed and the tech kept trying to make him move his legs around but he was having none of it and ignored her prodding (although Mommy's belly is a little sore and bruised today!)
He kept bringing his hand up to his face and twisting his head around but that is all the moving he did.
But speaking of moving, I am getting to where I can feel him moving and kicking much more regularly. He REALLY likes Dr. Pepper and goes nuts when I drink it. :)
I am also getting huge. People are now smiling at me and a few have even made comments. A little girl in the elevator at the doctor's office yesterday kept staring at my belly, then she said "My mommy is having a baby too." That was cute. :D
We went ahead and bought a new car last week. I knew it had to happen, since my car is a Jeep Wrangler. Not exactly easy to put a car seat into! So we added a Dodge Durango SUV to our collection. We kept the Jeep and Doug still has his truck, but at least now we have a baby-friendly car - with seating for 8! The best was that it was a "used" car because the dealership bought it at auction. So even though it only had 8 miles on it, it was considered used and we got it for about $14K under full price. Woohoo. The only bad part is now I have a car payment again. Sigh.
The baby's bag of "stuff" is getting pretty full too. There are about 6 or so outfits in there already, a very soft stuffed bear that someone gave me, 4 books that I got as a gift for the baby from a vendor we use, a couple of free sample diapers, and some really cute socks and hats. I hate to see how much stuff I'll have when the baby is actually here! :)
I think that is all that's going on now. I am SO very excited. I now feel very positive and optimistic that yes, I am going to be a mommy! I already love him SOOOOO much. :smileyh:
Crystal
The baby was sitting with his ankles crossed and the tech kept trying to make him move his legs around but he was having none of it and ignored her prodding (although Mommy's belly is a little sore and bruised today!)
He kept bringing his hand up to his face and twisting his head around but that is all the moving he did.
But speaking of moving, I am getting to where I can feel him moving and kicking much more regularly. He REALLY likes Dr. Pepper and goes nuts when I drink it. :)
I am also getting huge. People are now smiling at me and a few have even made comments. A little girl in the elevator at the doctor's office yesterday kept staring at my belly, then she said "My mommy is having a baby too." That was cute. :D
We went ahead and bought a new car last week. I knew it had to happen, since my car is a Jeep Wrangler. Not exactly easy to put a car seat into! So we added a Dodge Durango SUV to our collection. We kept the Jeep and Doug still has his truck, but at least now we have a baby-friendly car - with seating for 8! The best was that it was a "used" car because the dealership bought it at auction. So even though it only had 8 miles on it, it was considered used and we got it for about $14K under full price. Woohoo. The only bad part is now I have a car payment again. Sigh.
The baby's bag of "stuff" is getting pretty full too. There are about 6 or so outfits in there already, a very soft stuffed bear that someone gave me, 4 books that I got as a gift for the baby from a vendor we use, a couple of free sample diapers, and some really cute socks and hats. I hate to see how much stuff I'll have when the baby is actually here! :)
I think that is all that's going on now. I am SO very excited. I now feel very positive and optimistic that yes, I am going to be a mommy! I already love him SOOOOO much. :smileyh:
Crystal
Monday, April 9, 2007
It's a boy!
I just realized that I never wrote in my blog after my last U/S!
Our U/S was on 3/15 and I went in VERY nervous (after all, every doctor's visit has to bring bad news, right?).
It was immediately obvious that the baby was alive and well. He was kicking, opening and closing his little fists, moving his hands up and down... I was shocked that all of this could be going on inside me and I couldn't feel a thing!
Within a few minutes, she let us know that it is a boy. I was disappointed for about 30 seconds, as we were hoping for a girl. But it didn't take me long to get over it. I can say now that I really love my son and am SO THRILLED that he is coming! :D
She checked the baby, and he looks healthy - 4 chambers working away in his little heart, no spinal problems, 2 kidneys, no cleft palate. She couldn't see as much detail as she wanted because of my "extra tissue" aka FAT. :D So we go back on 4/16 to check more. But she said that pretty much all of the major problems were ruled out.
I already went to Baby Depot and got 3 outfits. I'm not a fan of boys' clothes, and that is the one sad part about not having a girl - the girls' stuff is SO ADORABLE! Then someone on FT told me about Babystyle, so I spent a little more on there. :D Their stuff is pricey but their clearance stuff is really cheap, so I focused on that.
Anyway, I have a tiny duffel bag full of stuff for the baby. I've also started a registry at Babies-R-Us, but still have research to do on car seats, strollers, etc.
The other exciting news is that we are pretty confident about his name. I printed out the 1000 top boy baby names. I went through them and highlighted the ones I didn't hate. Then Doug went back through and crossed out the highlighted ones he didn't like. We were left with 3 or 4 names, but one stuck out to Doug. It took me a little time to get used to it but I like it now.
His name will likely be Wyatt Douglas.
We wanted a name that was uncommon enough to where there won't be 3 other boys in his class with the same name, but common enough where people will know how to spell it. And we pretty much knew his middle name would be Douglas... Doug's middle name is his dad's name too.
That's all for now - more later!
Crystal
Our U/S was on 3/15 and I went in VERY nervous (after all, every doctor's visit has to bring bad news, right?).
It was immediately obvious that the baby was alive and well. He was kicking, opening and closing his little fists, moving his hands up and down... I was shocked that all of this could be going on inside me and I couldn't feel a thing!
Within a few minutes, she let us know that it is a boy. I was disappointed for about 30 seconds, as we were hoping for a girl. But it didn't take me long to get over it. I can say now that I really love my son and am SO THRILLED that he is coming! :D
She checked the baby, and he looks healthy - 4 chambers working away in his little heart, no spinal problems, 2 kidneys, no cleft palate. She couldn't see as much detail as she wanted because of my "extra tissue" aka FAT. :D So we go back on 4/16 to check more. But she said that pretty much all of the major problems were ruled out.
I already went to Baby Depot and got 3 outfits. I'm not a fan of boys' clothes, and that is the one sad part about not having a girl - the girls' stuff is SO ADORABLE! Then someone on FT told me about Babystyle, so I spent a little more on there. :D Their stuff is pricey but their clearance stuff is really cheap, so I focused on that.
Anyway, I have a tiny duffel bag full of stuff for the baby. I've also started a registry at Babies-R-Us, but still have research to do on car seats, strollers, etc.
The other exciting news is that we are pretty confident about his name. I printed out the 1000 top boy baby names. I went through them and highlighted the ones I didn't hate. Then Doug went back through and crossed out the highlighted ones he didn't like. We were left with 3 or 4 names, but one stuck out to Doug. It took me a little time to get used to it but I like it now.
His name will likely be Wyatt Douglas.
We wanted a name that was uncommon enough to where there won't be 3 other boys in his class with the same name, but common enough where people will know how to spell it. And we pretty much knew his middle name would be Douglas... Doug's middle name is his dad's name too.
That's all for now - more later!
Crystal
Monday, January 8, 2007
The vanishing twin
We went in today for our first real OBGYN appointment. He did an ultrasound and we saw that one of the babies is huge and is moving around like crazy. Then he searched and could not find the 2nd one. It is gone... how is that possible?
The doctor said there is no way he is just missing it - it isn't there.
We heard its heartbeat and now its gone.
I have very mixed emotions right now. So happy for the one that is growing strong, and so devastated for my other little baby that is gone.
My DH touched my belly and said "Bye baby." and I lost it.
I don't want to say goodbye.
Crystal
The doctor said there is no way he is just missing it - it isn't there.
We heard its heartbeat and now its gone.
I have very mixed emotions right now. So happy for the one that is growing strong, and so devastated for my other little baby that is gone.
My DH touched my belly and said "Bye baby." and I lost it.
I don't want to say goodbye.
Crystal
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)